Monday, April 11, 2011

Same Sex Marriage: Fighting For the Right



In the 1950’s and 1960’s the civil rights movement took place in the United States.  Hundreds of American citizens had to fight for their constitutional rights. They had to stand up against segregation, hatred and fear to get the respect they deserved.  Today, we, as a nation, look back at this event with reverence and esteem for those who were brave enough the fight for their right. We swore to never discriminate or deny American citizens the rights that they lawfully deserve. But, we are denying U.S citizens of their constitutional rights, daily. Instead of racial differences, we are now discriminating against different sexual orientation. For me, this “issue” should not be an issue at all.  Our country has far more pressing matters to deal with then arguing against something that shouldn’t need to be argued at all. I believe that, same sex couples deserve the same respect and rights as heterosexual couples, and allowing same sex marriage in every state would be the next logical step to achieving that goal. 

Same sex couples that wish to marry don’t always just want the social status of marriage; they also want a legal status.  Marriage gives couples many legal privileges that civil unions and domestic partnerships do not.  Some of the legal benefits of marriage are automatic inheritance, child custody, domestic violence protection, and rights to visitation/medical decisions of a spouse.  Civil unions and domestic partnerships don’t have any of these advantages.  One of the biggest issues with civil unions is that they don’t have rights letting you make medical decisions for your spouse.  Medical decisions must then be made by the next of kin; children, cousins, exedra. I remember watching a video on Plan Your Future Day showing a lesbian, civil union united, woman who was denied the right to make any medical decisions for her seriously ill partner. These choices had to be made by family members of the ill partner, who had not been in contact with the partner for several years.  In my opinion, it is cruel and unjust to deny someone the right to help and care for the one they love. If these rights and benefits are not given in a civil union or domestic partnerships and states are denying same sex couples the right to marry, then we are being unfair and unconstitutional to the citizens of this country.

             While interviewing Susan and Diane, a married lesbian couple of Shelburne VT, told me that by allowing same sex marriage in a state, that state becomes more economically set. "If only a few states allow same sex marriage and a lot of same sex couples want to get married, then they are going to pay to have their wedding in that state" said Susan. I had never thought of this before and I realized it is very true. States that do allow same sex marriage are Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and Iowa.  If there are only 6 states out of 50 that allow same sex marriage, then these states are going to have better economically standing due to the fact they allow this right.  More same sex couple will pay to be married, have their weddings and live in these states; thus making the population of the states stable as well.  If more states begin to allow and acknowledge same sex marriage then there economy may become more secure along with their population.

            Large portions of the people against same sex marriage have the argument that it will destroy family values and that the couples will raise their children in a nontraditional way.  Yet, in the U.S.A, 25 to 30% of children have come from divorced or separated homes.  I believe that family values are being more destroyed by divorce then by homosexual families. I have noticed that “broken homes” tend to leave children more upset and unhappy then homosexual homes have ever done.  As long as the parents of the children are caring and loving to the child, then I see no argument against people who wish to have and raise their own children.  Also, many states do not allow homosexual couples to adopt children, even if they are married.  I am very confused by this.  There are so many children in the world that wish, and need, to have homes and people to care for them.  If people want to start families and be good parents to a child that needs them, then I see no argument against allowing same sex couples to adopt and raise families. Every state, no matter what their standing is on same sex marriage, should allow same sex couples the right to adopt and raise children. 

Our nation has been known as “The land of the free, and the home of the brave” since before the civil war. Thousands of people have come bravely to our country on the dream that they will be free. Free to speak up against cruelty, free to worship what religion they choose, and freedom to protect themselves and their families. These are only a few of the freedoms and rights we allow in our nation. But imagine coming to this nation thinking that this is where you can finally be free. To finally have all the rights you lawfully deserve. But, you realize that this slogan, “The land of the free, and the home of the brave”, isn’t all true.  You are not totally free. They have lied to you and taken away the right to love and be happy; you are not allowed to marry the one you love.  But this slogan is not all untrue. This is the home of the brave. People can fight for what they want. They can stand up against injustice and speak their opinion. And so can you. You can fight and stand with people just like you and show with your numbers and your passion that “we are here and we deserve equality.” You must have hope and faith that your efforts are helping others and helping you get the rights you deserve. As the gay politician of San Francisco, Harvey Milk, once said “you’ve got to give them hope.”

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Harvey Milk Speech

An excerpt from a speech by Harvey Milk, a politician on the board of San Fransisco Representatives who was shot and died on November 27, 1978(1978-11-27) (aged 48) by former representative, Dan White. 

Monday, April 4, 2011

Become an AllyToday!

Become an ally and help fellow classmates feel safe and excepted! Join your schools Gay/Straight alliance club today and fight discrimination and prejudice! :)

Sunday, April 3, 2011

My Interview

Gaelyn Sullivan and I interviewed Susan and Diane on April 2, 2011.  Susan and Diane are a lesbian married couple who reside in Shelburne, VT. Gaelyn and I chose Susan and Diane to interview because we wanted a personal view on the topic of same sex marriage.
    Susan and Diane started off by saying that they had planned for a civil union and not a marriage. But when the right to marry was available to same sex couple in VT, they decided to have a wedding instead.  Diane said she struggled with the idea of a marriage. She wanted to make a statement with a civil union instead of having a traditional wedding but Susan felt the opposite. She came from a more traditional background where you were expected to marry.  So, they decided to have a wedding but made a couple of alterations, like walking down the aisle together instead of alone.  Diane said that every aspect had to be talked out because they had family on both sides that did not approve. In the end, they decided that the day was meant for them and not for anyone else, so they did what they wanted, and pleased them selves.  Diane and Susan where both married before they met and both of them have children. They said it was hard when they did come out because there where no support groups or anyone to really help you understand your sexuality.  They where very glad to hear that so many students are comfortable and open about their sexuality at CVU. "It took me years to actually come out" Diane said. "I'm glad to hear that kids are exploring their options now."  Diane and Susan also told us that by allowing same sex marriage in a state, that state becomes more economically set. "If only a few states allow same sex marriage and a lot of same sex couples want to get married, then they are going to pay to have their wedding in that state" said Susan.
      Susan and Diane where, originally, not the people I was going to interview.  I had decided to interview Saban Littlefield of Outright Vermont, but he is on vacation for these next few weeks. When Gaelyn offered to have a joint interview with me I was very excited to get a personal viewpoint on same sex marriage from a same sex married couple.  When I meet Susan and Diane, and sat down to our interview, they where so open and comfortable with talking to us about this topic.  I found that I didn't have to ask many questions because instead of having a quick interview we had a nice discussion that last just over 45 minutes. Gaelyn and I enjoyed talking with them so much we forgot about the time! I left their home with so much information on same sex marriage that I had never considered before. It was a great experience getting to know them.  

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Stakeholders

In the controversial issue of same sex marriage, there are many different opinions and viewpoints.  Mainly, the different sides to this topic are broken into two opposing views; pro same sex marriage and con same sex marriage.

Different Viewpoints:

Pro:
People who are pro same sex marriage have several different arguments. One of these is that same sex couples deserve the same marriage benefits (joint ownership, medical decision making) as man/women relationships.  Marriage is not only a social status it is also a legal one. Things such as taxes, joint ownership and insurance.  It also affects critical medical decisions. If a same sex partner becomes very ill, the other partner may not be allowed to visit because they are not "family". Pro people also argue that adoption rates would go up if all states allowed same sex married couples to adopt.  Since same sex couple can't conceive children on their own, obviously, the desire to adopt would greatly increase. And since there are hundreds of children in this world that need to be adopted, allowing same sex couples to create families of their own would be all for the better.

Con:
People who are con same sex marriage have many viewpoints on this topic.  Their most "talked about" argument is that same sex marriage goes against religion.  The majority of religions in our nation do not allow same sex coupling.  Many feel that asking them to perform same sex marriages would be a sin and that they do not want to be forced to do something that their religion would see as sinful. Another argument is that same sex marriage destroys traditional family values.  In their eyes, marriage was created for the conceiving of children and rearing them in the traditional ways.

Panel Day Reflection

The panelist for same sex marriage were Mary Anne Hegemen, a Mormon with an opposing view point, Tom Little, a former Legislate and rep. for Shelburne during the civil union issue, and David Zuckerman, who was a rep. for 14 years in the  Vermont House of Representatives.

Tom Little was very responsive to our questions on  the legal side of same sex marriage and gay/lesbian rights.  He had a very supportive legal view point and shared with us why, legally, not allowing same sex marriage was wrong.  I don't know what his personal viewpoint is (it may have been un-supportive, who knows?) but he defiantly supported same sex marriage through a legal standpoint because he saw no defense against marrying two people who wanted too be with one another.

Mary Anne Hegemen  was a tad frustrating. Her view point on the issue was based on the bible.  I did not find her personal view point frustrating, I was frustrated by her lake of participation. She did not answer any questions that were about the legal view or any particularly question on same sex marriage.  When she did answer questions about either children or family values, her answer was only "god will come and make it right." This doesn't offend me, even though this is not my view. What really bothered me was that she did not explain her answer.  She didn't say why this was her view or what it actually meant. This panelist did not help me very much.

I found David Zuckerman very helpful and the most passionate about the topic.  He really put his personal input into the discussion.  I also really agreed with his personal view. His views on the issue were that...its not not issue.  He thinks that there are many more issues in our nation that are much more concerning then same sex marriage, and I agree. He also thinks that our generation is much more tolerant of same sex couples then his ever was. I thinks this is true as well, just from looking at the people around me and observing their views.  I really liked that he was respectful but he still made his opinions known.